Christmas Time☃🎅🏼👼🏼

Today, December 24th. For some it is a day full of love when the whole family meets together, in the end, this once a year. However, when some are others in this day are lonely. Think of others who do not have a loving family, they have no home, money. Simply in the world they can't afford anything. As each each giving gifts, not thinking about the fact that someone more likely to need although small gesture, not a gift worth 1000 gold, euro or dollars. Unfortunately, no one would think of such people. All only care about themselves. And where's the love for one's neighbor. God loves everyone no matter who he is. In this one day suddenly everyone pretends to be a believer. Because, as you can otherwise call it once throughout the year does not care about their faith, and in this one day so much believe? With the rest of the where the real Eve. Once she was not giving yourself as the most expensive, the best gifts only to spend time with family, the gifts were sometimes hand-made things. This was not something sophisticated. Remember also about others. People went out to the streets, to be able to share what they have with others. This has been replaced with expensive gifts for loved ones, drink alcohol, elaborate meals, expensive clothes. Christmas has lost its true charm, no longer are such as I used to and probably never will, not back to what it used to be. I this Christmas as I spend the same, without any elaborate dishes, gifts. I will not rozczulała over each other because I'm aware of the fact that there are so many people around the world who do not even have a roof over their heads. So I ask you the next time you are looking for some expensive gift think about others who are more in need of the money which will release someone to make you pleased. Not a better gift would be the ability to make others feel better someone? Make the smile on someone's face?

Best Friend? Who?

Sitting in front of a laptop overtook me, a thought that I think not only me touched. For sure in life also had a situation where the doubt that you have real friends. I do not have them, I say this being a 100%. I'm not so that someone I can talk to without barriers. Maybe it's better. I prefer to withhold some things because I know that I could later regret that he she knows. You can never trust someone in 100% because always the few percent of this uncertainty will be in the US. Is an inevitable part of the US. There will always be risks and fear. It may seem strange to you the unthinkable but it's the truth, I do not want to trust anyone in 100% because I do not want to suffer. In humans it is easy to drive. Little, however, we are talking about your feelings. Few people who openly talks about what he thinks or feels. A friend is the one who should go first. And what if he only pretends to be our friend? We can't be sure. We do not know the truth. 

A lot of people do not dare however prevent himself thinks he can be denied. Here on the blog I move topics that hardly anyone dares to. I wouldn't dare to write in your own language, none of my environment does not know about this blog. However, this blog lets me sometimes feel better. Throw yourself is what I feel. 

My snapchat: realmebl

Carnival of life?

Life is one great Carnival or perhaps skit itself did not know exactly. Every day we wake up not knowing really what will bring us this day, what will be next. Surround us people that really don't know although we give them all your cares and worries. We can never be sure that our secrets remain just for them, no one else to know. There is always the risk that most people take, and then regrets it. I don't want to take that risk, I'm not so bold, very afraid of suffering that will come. For me, it's something much more than a simple expression of their feelings of the other person. I prefer to close in on itself than someone talk about what I feel, I prefer to stop your feelings to yourself.

Why I say that life is a Carnival? Maybe that's why every day, each takes a different mask, which often can not guess. Every day we assume a different costume, costume. Waking up not know what disguise we will set up. We cannot predict what will happen the next day or in a few minutes. Everything we are planning may disappear for one small thing. 

Me and My Live

Here I throw posts and do not know what? Probably the only for myself because like for someone else when no one is there. Rather, you are not interested in the life of a boring Polish 19 year old girls with problems in everyday life. Well, however, I next I wrote because I find it easier to just withstand with all that surrounds me with life because sometimes me it transcends, probably not only me, but also i was. Sometimes everyone has such thoughts where has enough life would like to shut up in an empty room and shout. Well life is shit. Will never be well I guess, or at least as we wanted to. No but what next we go through life. Soon waiting me to start the next stage in life. Currently waiting for me, and then studies of course if I pass a high school diploma because if not the same I do not know what I do, not thinking about the possibility of not takes the exam. Well life is unpredictable so I can't predict what will happen tomorrow, let alone speaking for several months. 

Day of monotony

Long ago I was not. This is because, unfortunately, the lack of time. Now being in a class 4 technical college I have very little time for myself especially since I work every weekend. For me nothing has changed. Already working elsewhere, but other than that it's all the same. I still sometimes moments when I'm sick of everything but I try not to think about it although sometimes it is very heavy. However, I know that there are people that I can count. One such person is my sister, niece currently studying and living in Olsztyn, but sometimes arrives. Life is not easy, always throws us the logs under your feet. Sometimes we laugh, and for a while we cry. I, being the person who survives everything I have a harder time because everything in excess sometimes feel but never show what I feel with the other, all the feelings of the soul in itself. I can not in front of anyone to open enough to be honest to pain talk, say what you really feel. This is beyond my capabilities. Terribly concerned about others and I worry about them, but I can not share their problems with others. Sometimes we have moments where we have enough, I at least I have. A moment when I would like someone all say release it with each other, stop choke but I can not simply. I'm afraid that I will become a public persona, that someone did not treat seriously what I say, and then it's more being . . .

Depression :-( My live is good for nothing

Not long ago I have discussed here. The reason was simply had too little time to devote to writing. Now the storm got me depression, sadness, frustration. I still cry when I think about how I use and how I've given up on actually colleague. I do not know whether you did I mention but may I am deputy head at the store. My head and knew it well that from September back to school and my lesson plan can be so arranged, that finish late and did not have the problem, argued that somehow we'll manage. About a month ago, however, have stated that they do not want to I was further Deputy and that the search will be on my place someone, and I have to go to work on weekends, which is a position that really does not exist, the position from which I started. Today I learned that I can be moved to another shop because two people on weekends may not be. I feel horrible because I tried to as I could, everything I learned and I that I can cope. I did the errors because no one has trained me as an alternate, from mistakes to teach everyone. So many tears I lost because I really care about working in this store and this store. This is my first job and I know that's not there but I don't want to simply be moved to a different shop and learn everything from scratch, read with the composition. I doubt that I was so great and the friendly atmosphere which is currently. I'm broken down and I do not know what to do. Next month comes my successor, Deputy Head of the new, I obviously I need this to lose because I have less hours which is associated with lower earnings. If they wanted to move me to another store I thought about after talking directly with the boss about it. Now it is not about position because I can recover them as I finish school in April, and I can adapt to the new Deputy, it's just a post but it certainly will not be able to a new Deputy as much as me and knew so much about the brand and the customer. On the one hand, I feel like quitting this job, but I don't want to leave because they were drawn to this store where great coping and know everything, and the people I work with. I do not know how I help it if I take, I'm afraid. :(

Vacation/Vacances/Vacaciones/ MAZURY

Mrągowo, Ruciane-Nida - MAZURY

Back to life, to write

Hello after a long time of interruptions caused by the lack of a laptop, a Tablet would be hard to write me after all. What has changed for me? Actually, it's still I am alone I am working as Deputy Head of the clothing in the living room, I had recently quite a few problems related to work, unfortunately, Currently working I lose the urge to try to, I do not know why but after the last incident that was upsetting to me does not work to me as well as it used to be. Now still looks to me, looks at me which is horrible because the envy of other people and lies in work broke. Sometimes I have the feeling that you've been searching for someone else in my place, that someone will find it just me exempt. It worries me because with the current Director despite small clashes both orally very well and also with the other girls at work, and actually one because the current new girl is some strange, not done me good impression so far, I've noticed that the same thought and my friend from work, with that great to me also works and gets along. Currently working so far, almost every day I got used to this, and now in the holidays as I work after 10 hours I will have a lot of free. I have completely no idea how to use this time to the truth. And going back in the future for two months will again be school and unfortunately being in 4th grade school I will have problem to be able to work out a month 180 hours as the Deputy what bothers me even more because I do not want to give up the position or work because currently in Poland after graduation not having knowledge is to anyone, it is not so easy.

New I. Happy?

Hello again dear reader. In recent times of my life there has been a lot of changes and it's positive. I was Deputy head at work, she returned my friend from Ukraine in the end! Tomorrow I meet with her Oh I can not wait and I regret that I have to sit in school for 13 hours. I was not last because I fell my laptop on Friday the 13th, of course. But I already have a peace in place of a netbook so I immediately write. As at the moment I'm happy with your purchase, we'll see if it will be so after prolonged use. No but what I'm going to bother with what I bought. My life transforms, so far in the positive side of everything goes I am immensely happy because I have enough sorrow and tears he wants to start to enjoy life and not cry. I want to enjoy life and the happiness to share with others.

Back to memories

Sitting at home in the day off because we have a national day meditate and remember. Now when I sit in front of my laptop remind me of the moments in life that shaped me as I am now. I mention friends and enemies, moments that are gone, family and loved ones. Sometimes I want to change everything, go back to those moments to do something more or change something. I'm probably the only such person, but one of the few that are not afraid to talk about it, and actually write. Make a lot of mistakes in my life that I would like to fix it, which if I'd just may not have committed, I would never. While in College, along with her friend remember that steal money from class colleagues, who took them. Soon it all came to light. Now when these moments I recall it was not worth it, and eat such a humiliation for the stupid 40 PLN. But what we were then just children who are taught only life. I think, however, that it led me to who I am now, gave me a lesson for the future. Currently, I am a person in itself, others know me as much as they let me only. I prefer to read in the room than partying. I've been working out in the shop with clothing, and I've gotten honest to a fault, I try to live so that I don't have to be ashamed for itself. It is one of the many memories so that the rest is dearer. For example, as I stayed with friends, sleep in a tent in her back yard when we were wearing in two suddenly something started banging in tent and open closed entrance, I remember that awful to be afraid, but in the end, the same laugh at each other. We were very good friends. Unfortunately, the friend has not survived and fell apart in high school. It has changed drastically, so much so that her writings not, not in terms of appearance, but behavior became quite a different girl, but unfortunately I do not have time for me. It's sad how people changed society and how it's easy to forget about the people who were close to him. Sometimes sitting in the room it is writing saves me, it helps to pour out emotions roiling tides in me, emotions that can sometimes overwhelm me, with whom I can not cope. Writing is my stepping stone from it all, this is something that makes me great pleasure. Therefore, I would like to someday work as a journalist, and in his spare time to write stories because according to some I'm doing it as well. Maybe someday I will put here a slice of one of the stories. Maybe it will be on the occasion of the 1000 page views of your blog? The same I do not know.

Teachers and evaluation

Polish teachers break me anymore. I'm telling the truth. Consider today. A friend who is not passed from Polish and now it comes to my class have still problems with Polish. It stuck to the teacher to her since the beginning of the year, it is a visible and none of this does nothing. Example: I wrote to improve development on 5 and also wrote virtually identical to an essay a friend, she barely had two. Today, with the test I had to prove one of his his right to set me 5, but when it came to work friend teacher has set its just 1 for no reason because she had written at least 2 assessment. Just read your name on a piece of paper. In addition she was cheeky. So I ask where you have teachers who really suited to this profession, who assess fairly, and not for the fact that someone they like. I'm upset such a situation. And that kind of Poland has a higher level of education? Certainly not the culture because the culture itself requires that each be treated equally, it is as if someone judged on skin color or religion. Apparently, now you only need no such name to be evaluated. Getting worse happens in Polish schools. And wondering that young people flee from here, since there is no future. In the same school. Like how we have to prepare for it, since the Polish classroom reading are discussed on 2-3 lessons for math students must fend for themselves because they "do not understand" something of some teachers is not acceptable, and the English no longer mention, now if you yourself do not teach at home in school do not teach. Teachers should encourage students to help them solve problems and look for solutions. After this we go after school to get the knowledge that, and so for the most part to no avail.

Hello It's Me

Hejka then again I, so after a long break I decided to finally write something. I am currently a contrasting school still learning and science, Einstein or Hamlet. You can go mad, but oh well such is life. Recently, I was just wondering on how to make it look like my life if I hadn't gone to Harvard or Oxford. From what I read that there were on the Internet itself, it appears that the brew is so hard to not appearances to get on any of the University. But not looking too far into the future I'm curious what's going on with you dogs reader or czytelniczko. My life is currently in: I do not want to do anything in addition to healthy eating. Recently I started to mix the fruits of mixing them, they are delicious and very healthy. Now, to my taste a cocktail from banana, kiwi and oranges, it is delicious and even without added sugar it tastes wonderful. Do you also like something healthy to eat or drink instead of calories? I'm curious how many people also prefer healthier things.

If you have any questions and you do not want to ask them here go ahead write on meil: kasiula29. 04@gmail. com and feel free to track my:
 snapchat: mysiaa97
 instagram: memories.

Thank You!

I am blown away! After yesterday's post impressions very quickly grew to almost 500. It's really a feat. This excited me tremendously. Getting up in the morning when I saw the number of the day is immediately improved, each blogger seeing so fast growth will be really happy. Assuming your blog did not expect that will go on until the number of people. It's a very motivated to continue writing, letting their own feelings. You can forget about everyday life and, like reading a book mute so and writing for you. To this end and very thank for the fact that you are here.

In life, in fact, there are things worth fighting to the very end. - Paulo Coelho

How do you day has passed? Because me as somehow good, in high school I was only three hours. Was the day open to high school students so they can become familiar with the building and available opportunities for further learning. Showing them I noticed that they were very shy, afraid to try. I did so and I was able to go home. Ever since I came back to collect science for tomorrow because he is waiting for me tomorrow test of geography. So you have that you'd like to take to learn and you will not go? All of a sudden are there any commitments or you need to do something in the same time as you learn?
I have. I'm sitting already probably the fifth time next to the books and still went to them. Promises to be an interesting test this tomorrow.
And as for my good humor, I hope that this will remain so because if you've read my previous posts guessed that rarely are days when I'm in a good mood. In addition, I am pleased by the fact that over the nearly 4 months is more than 300 impressions. It really motivates you. Sometimes it is here by writing to let loose, relaxes. The addition of music, then what? It depends on the mood already.
Now I listen to while writing the text of the song:

I like it and you?

Easter-tears, melancholy

My life sucks. This is the truth. Easter, and I was alone at home, there is no even to speak up. All friends spend their time with their families. I unfortunately do not have a family, or at least that you interested in getting involved is what I feel and what I want. Sitting at home all the time, think practically. About my life and what it will be about the fact that others at the same time are among the people who love them. It's funny because I think I was the only I would like to live with your parents feel their love and enjoy their presence. I was not ever feel love, parental always missed me since I can remember. Melancholy comes at me especially in the holidays when I sit alone trying to recall a happy moment in my life involved with the family, but there is no such. The only light they are memories my foster grandmother, which I think that I loved because I felt that despite her anger when I did something wrong. With her I was happy with it I spent the most beautiful moments, even a trip to England after all was not so beautiful. My grandmother gave me love and happiness, now when it is not I was quite alone. I don't have one with you. Nobody can tell you what I feel for the truth, I have no friends that I could like to confide that I understood and not rejected. Because who would want to know someone like me. Pretending to be someone else better to me is to live, it's easier. No need to explain why I am sad and I have tears on the cheeks. Like everyone I love and happiness. Is it so much? Do I wish impossible? . . . Sometimes I fall asleep and never wake up, dreaming forever

Free Time,Terrorists, Bruxelles

As the title says I have a free school rests, and actually I rest. In Poland, Easter is coming so it's time to relax. Today, half of the day I spent on cleaning the House, doing spring cleaning. Now I just write this sitting and resting because tomorrow morning waiting for me. I do not know what to do. I do not have or inclination to draw or too much something to read, and in his mind the emptiness so stories don't you finish so far. A lot of impressions came and still comes which makes me extremely excited and motivated to write. I do not know whether to refer here by accident or you are really curious to know if you want me to answer this will be happy to read your comment. Maybe you have an idea, maybe something you wish you find out or see it on my blog, or maybe you have an idea to improve it because something is missing? We will gladly accept any help.

And now something about the last coup. Can You not celebrate or tired but I can't leave it just like that. It hurts me when I hear about subsequent attacks. Tule killed people who are innocent. Tears running down his cheeks, a sadness after their relatives everywhere. I do not understand why these terrorists so they want to be shocked the whole nation, not only of the opinion a horrible issue itself but about the people of the same nationality. I'm not against refugees or with them. I think that we should help each other because each one of us can meet such tragedy, people are bad guys and good guys. You good need help in the face of such tragedy. The same certainly myself never advise.
It is my opinion, and what is yours?

Unlucky Friday

So as the title says, today's the day for me was terribly unlucky. In the morning I had some events which as we know has not caused me a smile on his face. First bicycle padlock did not want to open, then fell me a new phone (Fortunately the whole), and at the end of the day, lost has just bought a Holster to your phone. A great day is not what. In addition, still I feel bad, and tomorrow in the morning until late in the evening. I do not know how tomorrow I stand those 10 hours with customer service, it will be a total massacre. I'd been in the House with a cup of warm milk with honey tomorrow but unfortunately I do not have such a possibility, I wanted to work on the weekends, now I have it. Thank you also to all those who are here, it's really nice to see that someone looks on your blog. Believe me it really motivates you to write.

The future and dreams-it is worth to fight for it

Due to the fact that most of my readers come from abroad, I don't see the point to write in Polish. You will definitely not be without language mistakes but I hope that you will forgive me.

Today surprised me really, the weather was very nice until you want to go out and greet the new day. I spent practically most of the day outside you do not regret. Now having some time off, I started to look around for a potential trip to the United States and Canada. So for your holidays. This is one of my dreams but when I looked at the prices on really shocked, so I began to look for participating in as a volunteer, but unfortunately I found nothing so far. By the way, had a look over a couple of College, which I really liked, and i think it's worth fighting about the possibility of studying in the USA or Canada. Is it just me? If you think so too? It is worth to go to America to study or volunteer holiday? May I found a long, but the family, which I had no way to know but I know, that is for sure. Oh, and one more I forgot. Recently I sent an excerpt from my story to one of the publications. I got the answer! I found it very easy to read and it's very addictive, but unfortunately I can only dream of being issued, the main reason is the lack of funds for its release.

Słońce za oknem ! The sun behind the window!

Tak jak mówi sam tytuł za naszymi oknami pojawiło się przez wszystkich wyczekiwane niecierpliwie słoneczko. Dziś dzień był bardzo piękny, aż chciało się wyjść z domu i cieszyć się każdą chwilą, którą mamy. Jest to zapewne zwiastun zbliżającej się wielkimi krokami wiosny. Ja czekam niecierpliwie na cieplejsze dni by móc zrzucić zimowe kurtkę, ubrać się lżej. A wy też oczekujecie na takie cieplutkie dni? A jeśli chodzi o moje życie no cóż w nim nic się nie zmieniło choćbym bardzo tego chciała. Obecnie mam również stan zapalny prawego oka, a przez co? Przez dwufazowy płyn do demakijażu oczu firmy Lirene. Nie polecam go osobom, które nie miały z nim wcześniej do czynienia bo mogą się spotkać z przykrymi efektami ubocznymi. Wiem, że ostatnio strasznie mało piszę ale jakoś nie mam czasu, a to praca a to szkoła zawsze coś się znajdzie.


As the title says, for our Windows popped up by all eagerly awaited Sun. Today was a very beautiful until the wanted to get out of the House and enjoy every moment you have. This is probably a harbinger of the upcoming Spring strode. I am waiting eagerly for warmer days in order to be able to shed the winter jacket, dress lightly. And you also expect such light days? And when it comes to my life well in it nothing has changed very much, even if she wanted to. Now I also have inflammation of the right eye, and for what? By two-phase make-up Remover eyes company Lirene. I would not recommend it to people who don't have it to do because they can meet with unpleasant side effects. I know that the last terribly low write but somehow I do not have the time, and it's work and that the school always find something.

Witam po przerwie Hello after a break

Przepraszam, że rzadko tutaj bywam ale natłok nauki jest ogromny, czasami już nie daję rady Do tego dochodzi praca i inne obowiązki. Obecnie siedzę na łóżku z laptopem na kolanach otoczona książkami, które czekają aby się nimi zająć. Masa nauki mimo, że matura za rok. Nauczyciele nie rozumieją uczniów, dla nich ważne jest to by zrealizować temat i mieć święty spokój. Nie interesuje ich, że nie dajemy rady, że to za dużo. Masz to zrobić i koniec bo ocena niedostateczna. Niestety niesprawiedliwość nadal istnieje. Nikt tego nie powstrzyma . Pamiętam, że kiedyś szkoła była dla mnie czymś miłym bo mogłam dowiedzieć się nowych rzeczy, czegoś ciekawego nauczyć, obecnie mam jej dość. Jak można słuchać w kółko i to samo tego samego. To jest już przesada wystarczy to raz przerobić. Po co też uczyć się gdzie jest jakieś miasto czy obiekt skoro i tak mało nas to obchodzi bo nie mamy zamiar pojechać tam, a jeśli nawet to sami potrafimy odnaleźć informacje na ten temat. Na tym niestety zakończę gdyż muszę wracać do nauki. Na umilenie reszty dnia, a dla niektórych moich czytelników z tego co zauważyłam początku dnia pozostawiam piosenkę uczestniczki tegorocznej Eurowizji 2016 Aidy Nikolaychuk. Zaczęłam jej słuchać po tym jak przez przypadek wpadłam na nagranie rosyjskiego muzycznego show gdzie jej głos był niezwykły, sędziowie myśleli, że to nie ona śpiewa.

I'm sorry that I rarely visit here but the plethora of science is a huge, sometimes already do not give advice To that work and other obligations. Now I'm sitting on the bed with the laptop on my lap surrounded by books that are waiting to take care of them. The weight of science although the school for a year. Teachers don't understand the students, it is important for them to realise about it and have peace of mind. I'm not interested in them, they do not give advice that is too much. You have to do it and the end because insufficient assessment. Unfortunately there is still injustice. No one can stop. I remember that I used the school for me was something nice because I was able to learn new things, to learn something interesting, now I have it fairly. How can you listen to over and over again and the same thing of the same. This is already too much just this time. After which they learn where a city or an object once and so little we care because we have no intention to go there, and even if this alone we can find information on this topic. At the end, unfortunately, because I have to go back to science. To make the rest of the day, and for some of my readers from what I noticed early in the day I leave the song of this year's Eurovision Song Contest contestants 2016 Aida Nikolaychuk. I started to listen to it once by accident, I got a recording of the music of the Russian show where her voice was remarkable, the judges thought that it is not she sings.

Ferie,brak czasu...

Hejka przepraszam, że dawno mnie tu nie było ale niestety nie miałam zbytnio czasu pomimo ferii. Praca praktycznie codziennie do późna nie dodawała mi siły lecz ujmowała każdego dnia.Dziś mam wolne więc postanowiłam coś napisać. U mnie obecnie nic się nie dzieje. To co zwykle, matka mnie olewa, a ja sama sobie radzę. Wiele osób pragnie właśnie móc wyrwać się od rodziców, do własnego kąta. Nie jest to dobry pomysł sama chciałabym mieć kochających rodziców, którzy się o mnie troszczą i okazują mi swoją miłość. Zazdroszczę tym którzy to mają i jestem też zła bo czemu ci co nie potrafią docenić tej miłości mają ją, a ja nie mogę? Co jest ze mną nie tak? Czy to tylko mnie spotyka? Sama nie wiem ale na co dzień widuję niewdzięczność dzieci, widzę to jak traktują swoich rodziców, tych którzy kochają je bezgranicznie i dbają o niego. Czemu do cholery jasnej pytam się jesteście tacy ślepi na miłość? Zbliża się 14 lutego walentynki. Niby dzień dla par zakochanych. Zmieńcie to i chociaż raz w życiu pokażcie waszym rodzicom jak bardzo ich kochacie ,Że widzicie co dla was robią i jak bardzo was kochają. Kochać można nie tylko chłopaka,męża czy narzeczonego, ale i mamę czy tatę. Gdzie jest niby zapisane, że 14 luty to dzień dla par aby wyznały sobie miłość spędzili mile czas. Z rodzicami też tak można. Sama chciałabym mieć rodziców i móc zabrać ich gdzieś, spędzić mile z nimi właśnie czas bo nigdy nie wiadomo ile tego czasu nam pozostało. Powinno okazywać się miłość na każdym kroku każdego dnia rodzicom. Cieszcie się i bądźcie dumni z rodziców, że wytrwali przy was i trwają, że kochają was nadal pomimo życiowych błędów i utrudniania im życia.


 Hey sorry about that long ago to methere wasn't but unfortunately I had toomuch time, despite the holidays. Workvirtually every day until late, not lent methe strength but recognise each day.Today I got a free so I decided to writesomething. For me now, nothinghappens. What is usually the mothersmack me, and I advise myself. A lot ofpeople would like to just be able to breakfree from their parents, to their ownangle. This is not a good idea for thesame I would like to have loving parentswho really care about me and show meyour love. I envy those who have it andi'm also bad because making those whodo not appreciate that love to her, and Ican't? What is wrong with me? Is it justme meets? The same I do not know butevery day I see ingratitude of children, Ican see how they treat their parents,those who love them immensely andcare about him. Why the hell is clear Iask are those blind for love? Coming upon February 14, Valentine's day. Kind ofday for couples in love. Change it andalthough the once in a lifetime showyour parents how much you love them,That you can see what you are doing andhow much you love. Love can not onlyboyfriend, husband or boyfriend, butmom or dad. Where is the like recordedthat on February 14 is a day for couplesto wyznały love spent mile time. Withparents too, so you can. The same Iwould like to have the parents and beable to take them somewhere to spendmiles with them, just the time becauseyou never know how much of this timewe left. Should show love every step ofeach day parents. Enjoy and be proud ofyour parents, that persevered with youand they love you still in spite of life'smistakes and hindering them in life..

Lepszy dzień?A może jednak nie?

Tak dziś miałam lepszy dzień.Może i jest poniedziałek, ale tydzień rozpoczął się w miarę dobrze nie licząc jedynki z matematyki.Niechętnie wstawałam dziś z łóżka z racji, że była to 6 godzina bo na 8 do szkoły.Chętnie pospałabym do późna, niestety jest to nie możliwe. Jak co dzień poszłam do szkoły. Nie było źle. Dowiedziałam się, że moja siostra cioteczna, która jest mi bardzo bliska i nie wiem jak to będzie gdy wyjedzie na studia dowiedziała się, że z jej klasy jedyna zdała próbną maturę z polskiego. Wow jestem z niej dumna bo wiem jak trudno jest zdać. Nie miałam dziś powodu do smutku, aż do chwili gdy to piszę. Teraz tak myśląc o tym, że niedługo może wyjechać na studia robi mi się smutno na sercu bo wiem, że kontakt nie będzie już taki jak jest. Co ja zrobię sama? Tak to zawsze mogłam z nią porozmawiać, pośmiać się razem z czegoś, czy wypić piwo, a co będzie teraz? Nie wiem sama, jedynie co wiem,że sporo się zmienia w moim życiu i jeszcze zmieni. Codziennie staram się nie myśleć o smutnych rzeczach i mieć pozytywne myśli. Chcę dążyć do spełnienia marzeń. Nie chcę na nikim polegać. Nie pamiętam kiedy bym polegała na matce czy kimś innym. Życie nauczyło mnie do tej pory jednego,że można liczyć jedynie na siebie, na nikogo innego. Może to i smutne, ale taka jest prawda. Chcę mieć lepsze życie niż obecnie mam, nie musieć martwić się smutkami tylko móc się cieszyć każdą chwilą jaką mam. Chcę podążać za marzeniem, które gdy się postaram może być osiągalne. Chcę połączyć pasję z pracą. Chcę po prostu szczęścia. Czasem między znajomymi chodzą rozmowy o tym jakie będzie życie i czy chcą mieć dzieci. Ja na obecną chwilę nie, bo skąd mogę mieć pewność, że będę dobrą matką skoro nie miałam dobrego przykładu. Nie chcę narażać w przyszłości dziecka na to co ja od dziecka przechodzę. Wolę być sama niż kogoś krzywdzić, powodować u kogoś łzy. Tak samo jest ze związkiem. Miałam chłopaka, którego skrzywdziłam i wiem to. Kochał mnie, ale ja nie potrafiłam pokochać jego. Nie potrafiłam ograniczyć się, żyć nie tylko dla siebie. Nie wiem czy potrafię kochać kogoś, kogoś innego niż rodzinę. Nie widziałam zbyt dużo przykładów miłości ani sama jej nie doświadczyłam. Wiem, że może być dziwne skoro czytam romanse to nie zakochałam się, ale taka prawda. Czytam je bo dla mnie to świat, w którym chciała bym żyć. Uciekam od codzienności, przenoszę się gdzie indziej gdy czytam jakiś romans. Jestem wtedy wolna, czuję się lepiej.


So today I had a better day. Maybe it'sMonday, but a week had startedreasonably well, not counting ones inmathematics. Reluctant to wstawałamtoday from the bed because it was a 6hour because at 8. Happy pospałabym tolate, unfortunately this is not possible.Like every day I went to school. It wasnot bad. I found out that my great aunt'ssister, who is very close to me and i donot know how it will be when you leavefor college she learned that from herclass only passed the test with a highschool diploma. Wow I am proud of itbecause I know how hard it is to pass. Ihad no reason today to sorrow, until thetime when I write this. Now just thinkingabout it, that may soon go to Collegemake me sad at heart because I knowthat the contact will no longer be such asit is. What I will do the same? So, I couldalways talk to her, laugh together withsomething, or drink a beer, and what willhappen now? I do not know, only what Iknow, that a lot of changes in my life andstill have change. Every day I try not tothink about the sad things and havepositive thoughts. I want to strive for thefulfillment of dreams. Don't want to relyon anyone. I can't remember when I wasthe mother or someone else. Life hastaught me to date, one that you cancount only on themselves, on anyoneelse. Maybe it's sad but it is true. I want tohave a better life than I currently have,will not have to worry about sorrows justto be able to enjoy every moment I have.I want to follow your dream, that whenI'll try may be achievable. I want tocombine passion with work. I just wanthappiness. Sometimes between friendsgo around talking about what life will beand whether they want to have children.I do not at the moment, because howcan I be sure that I will be a good motherif I was not a good example. I don't wantto jeopardize the future of the child forwhat I'm going through a child. I preferto be alone than to hurt someone, causesomeone to tears. The same is true withthe. I had a boyfriend, which hurt and i know it. He lovedme,but I couldn't love him. I could notconfine themselves to live not only formyself. I do not know if I can lovesomeone, someone other than thefamily. I have not seen too manyexamples of love or same notexperienced before. I know that it can beweird since I read romances is not fell inlove with,but it's true. I read thembecause to me, it's a world in which Iwanted to live. Escape from theeveryday, I move elsewhere when I reada romance. I'm then free, I feel better.

A na koniec piosenka, która wpadła mi dziś w ucho:

Muzyka...

Post będzie krótki. Na co dzień zazwyczaj słucham smutnych piosenek i powolnych bo one mnie uspokajają, może i wywołują łzy ale dają też do myślenia.Nie przepadam za hucznymi piosenkami może dlatego że moje życie jest smutne więc i piosenki też słucham smutne. Bardziej do mnie pasują, nie chodzi wtedy o wykonawcę ale o samą muzykę i tekst. Poniżej dodaję jedną piosenkę z wielu, które dają do myślenia ale i mi się podobają. Miłego słuchania.

Post will be short. Every day I usuallylisten to sad songs and slow becausethey soothe me, maybe cause the tearsbut also give food for thought. I do notlike with loud songs maybe because mylife is sad and the song also I listen tosad. More to me to fit, it's not about theartist but the same music and text.Below I am adding one song of manythat give food for thought but I likethem. Have a nice listening.

Moje życie...

Jest wiele osób piszących blogi.Ja nie jestem jedyna i to wiem. Wiem również, że warto podążać za marzeniami pomimo odległości. Ja dążę do spełnienia marzeń chociaż to nie jest łatwe, wręcz jest trudne bo moje życie nie jest cudowne. Czasami mam ochotę odpuścić skoro ludzie wokół mnie twierdzą, że nie  warto marzyć bo co mi z tego. Wychowałam się w rodzinie gdzie nie czułam się nigdy szczęśliwa na dłuższą metę. Może to dziwne bo niby jak dziecko może nie być szczęśliwe. Niestety ja byłam. Odkąd pamiętam rodzice się kłócili, zawsze były jakieś problemy. Życie nie było dla mnie łatwe i nadal nie jest. Będąc dzieckiem tak na prawdę dowiedziałam się, że mój tata tak na prawdę nim nie jest. Teraz mam osiemnaście lat i nadal to boli, ta niewiedza. Kim on jest? Czy wie o mnie? Czemu mnie nie chciał? Dość często zadaję sobie te pytania jednak nie potrafię na nie znaleźć odpowiedzi. Dla mnie to jedna wielka niewiadoma. Matki nie mam o co pytać bo wątpię by mi powiedziała. Nie mam z nią dobrych stosunków, tak na prawdę jestem pozostawiona sama sobie. Moje życie jest dalekie od ideału. Matka od trzech lat ma chłopaka z którym mieszka, a mną się mało co interesuje. Potrafi tylko narzekać i powodować kłótnie. Do domu nie pamiętam już kiedy przyjechała na dłużej niż chwilę. Sama sobie ze wszystkim muszę radzić.Jednak czasami mam dość, dość tego życia. Dość zakładania codziennie rano maski pod którą ukrywam swoje uczucia i prawdziwą siebie. Nie mam nikogo z kim mogła bym porozmawiać o tym co czują naprawdę i jak cierpię. Jedyną osobą która dawała mi poczucie bezpieczeństwa i miłości byłą moja babcia, która zmarła w 2011 roku. Od tamtej pory wszystko się zawaliło. Święta są zwykłymi dniami o których nie warto pamiętać. Tak na prawdę jedynie moje zwierzaki są przy mnie. To one powodują,że się czasami uśmiecham i nie jest to sztuczny uśmiech. Przy nich nie muszę nic ukrywać. Wolę spędzać czas w domu bo tu jestem sama ze sobą i nie muszę zakładać maski. W szkole wszyscy mają mnie za szaloną dziewczynę, która stara się dobrze uczyć i jest miła. Może to i lepiej bo po co miałabym się im tłumaczyć dlaczego chodzę smutna.Zakładam blog, nie dlatego aby zyskać popularność ale aby móc przelać to co czuję i może poczuć się lepiej. Nie dbam tutaj o pisownie bo błędów na pewno popełniam wiele.Nie jestem lingwistą.

There are many people who write blogs. I'm not the only one and I know. I also know that it is worth to follow dreams despite the distance. I strive to fulfill yourself a dream though it is not easy, indeed is difficult because my life is wonderful. Sometimes I feel like let go since people around me say that it is not worth to dream because I with this. I grew up in a family where I didn't feel like never happy in the long run. Maybe it's kind of strange because as a child you may not be happy. Unfortunately I was. Ever since I can remember parents arguing, there's always been some problems. Life was not easy for me and still is not. As a child in fact I found out that my dad so really it is not. Now I'm eighteen years old and still it hurts, this ignorance. Who is he? Do you know about me? Why I do not want? Quite often, I ask myself these questions, however, I can not find the answer. For me, it's one big question mark. Mothers do not have what to ask because I doubt that to me, she said. I do not have good relations with it, in fact I'm left to itself. My life is far from ideal. The mother of three years has a boyfriend with whom she lives, and me a few things I'm interested in. Can only complain and cause strife. Home I do not remember when she arrived for more than a moment. Myself with everything I need. However, sometimes I have quite enough of this life. Quite fitting mask every morning you hide your feelings and true self. I do not have anyone with whom I could talk about what you really feel and how I suffer. The only person that gave me a sense of security and love was my grandmother, who died in 2011. Since then, everything is destroyed. The holidays are the usual days not worth remembering. So it's really only my pets with me. They cause sometimes I smile and it is not an artificial smile. With them I don't have anything to hide. I prefer to spend my time at home because here I am alone with myself and I don't have to wear a mask. In high school we all have me for a wild girl who tries to teach well and is nice. Maybe it's better for what I looked like to them to explain why go sad. I assume the blog, not because to gain popularity but in order to be able to transfer what i feel and can make you feel better. I don't care about spelling mistakes because surely I'm doing a lot. I am not a linguist.